office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
