you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
