How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
