allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
