at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
