Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
