I bet he comes in French.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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