No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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