I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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