Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize