Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
