Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
