If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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