Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
