Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
