do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.