I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize