you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
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at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
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Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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