Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
