Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
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