so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
