tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Randomize