i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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