Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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