Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You're breaking my sexual little heart
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
