I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
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dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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