Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Randomize
