i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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