Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
