U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
