Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
