Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
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