I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
You should frame my arrest warrant.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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