The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
