i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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