i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
