my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
