Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
