I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize