he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
