I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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