Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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