Her vagina should come with caution tape.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
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