The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
