Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
