You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
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