i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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