During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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