I think i peed on brittanys purse
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize