Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
