Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
