someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
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