Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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