absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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