Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize